Love Is Patient and Kind

Day One- Love is Patient; Love is Kind~1 Cor. 13:4 (NIV)

Our first look into the Biblical definition of love is: it is patient and kind. Compare to the NKJV which reads “love suffers long and is kind”.

Love suffers long sounds a little more intense than patient. Patience is what you need when your spouse leaves the cap off the toothpaste and it leaks all over the counter…the third time this week! Suffers long is when difficulties arise in your relationship and you refuse to allow anger to be your response. The Bible says in 1 Peter 4:8 “Love covers a multitude of sins”. Love should always be your first response no matter the situation.

When we go back to the original meaning of the word used here: in Greek the word means “to maintain internal and external control in a difficult circumstance”. Love covers a bad situation. Love says, I am not happy about what you have done or what has happened but my love for you will not give up!  I will remain calm and work this out with you. God wants our love to look like this! For this is how God loves us!! He remains patient with us when we make mistakes. His love suffers long with us through bad situations. He loves even when we don’t return His love!! He remains faithful, even when we are not. No matter the circumstance, His love for us always prevails. His love covers our multitude of sins.

Love is kind. Kind is such a “nice” word and does not sound too involved and somewhat self-explanatory. The Webster’s defines kind as: affectionate, loving; of a sympathetic or helpful nature, of a forbearing nature. When evaluating your love on this level. How kind are you too your spouse? Are you sympathetic when he/she is hurting? Do you show forbearance when they have wronged you? Are you affectionate and loving? Or only when you what something? The Bible says in Romans 5:8 That God demonstrated his love for us in this, that while we were still sinners Christ died for us. This is what kindness looks like. He loved us so much that He was sympathetic of our situation. He granted forbearance for our sins before we even acknowledged Him; he died for us. He did not die because you were showering Him with love. He died while you were an adulterer.  His love suffers long and is kind.

Maybe as your reading this you are thinking, “I have suffered long”. Then you must ask, have you done it kindly? The key word in this passage is the word AND. Love is patient AND kind. It is very possible to be patient without being kind. I see this in many relationships, including my own. At the beginning of my 23 years of marriage, although I was ready for love, my spouse was not. I was patient. I fought the good fight, and I suffered long to keep our love alive. Over the years I have allowed my love to cover a lot mistakes. I had forgiven more times than I could count, but then lived the life of a victim. You see, I was not kind about it. I knew he didn’t deserve forgiveness. I was quick to remind him of those times he hurt me. I suffered long, but required him to repay me every day since then. This is not kindness. Kindness is an act of forbearance. Forbearance says you can never pay back your debt and therefore I will stop demanding payment.

So what does real love look like: It is willing to wait for you! In love you are not fearful to make a mistake or to confess your failures. A place where you have no fear that love will be abandoned when times get tough. When finances are strained. When physical aliment arises. When you fall down, love will pick you up. Love should always be the strongest emotional response to every situation. It will plead on your behalf, even when you are wrong. It should grant you forbearance, even when you don’t deserve it and will not hold it over your head in order to control you. Love will love you when times are good. Love will still be there when times are not good. ~ Love is a not a feeling, it is a decision! ~ Love Never Fails!